Sunday, April 19, 2009

New threat to American theatres

As millions hundreds all fourteen of expateek's readers know, expateek loves the movies.

She's been going to her favorite the only art movie theatre in her old town to catch up on what she's been missing. She saw The Reader, which was great. She saw Slumdog Millionaire, which was fabulous. And then she saw Two Lovers, which was dreadful.

And Two Lovers wasn't just awful because it was depressing and dark, and entirely too full of the excessively gorgeous and blonde Gwyneth Paltrow. No, Two Lovers was extra awful because the sound track was ragged and mumbly and expateek couldn't understand a word.

So even though expateek almost never complains (only when she's breathing, according to Mr D), she decided to have a word with the cinema manager.

Excuse me, said expateek to the guy in the ticket booth.

Yes?

Are you ever gonna fix the speakers in Theatre 3? Because the speakers sound like they're totally blown. I know I'm kind of old, and wear reading glasses, but honestly, I'm not deaf as well! I couldn't make out a word of the dialogue, said expateek in her polite complainey voice.

Oh, yeah, we know. Actually, the speaker repair guy is coming tomorrow. Here.

And the boy in the booth started writing out two free passes to the theatre. Thanks for telling us. And here, take these, and come again.

Not entirely willing to let the point die, expateek continued. Yeah, I saw Slumdog Millionaire here two weeks ago and the sound was awful then too.

Ha! said the kid in the booth. We think that's what caused the problem. You know those Indian movies? They just don't know anything about how to do a sound track.

Hmmm. All the Oscars and Baftas and Critic's Choice Awards and Golden Globes notwithstanding, those Indian films are just... well... wrong. And you heard it here in Chicagoland first.


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5 comments:

Christine said...

Whiny voice: "I never get out to the movies. I want to see Slum Dog Millionaire. I will probably end up having to wait for the video. It is NOT the same." Stamps foot!

Christine said...

Maybe that is for the best. Wouldn't want our Canadian theaters wrecked. I wonder if it will ruin my TV?

expateek said...

Hah! LOL, "Canadian theatres wrecked"! Yes, see it on DVD, it's amazing. I think the theatre guy was just looking for excuses. I can't believe things like Fast and Furious VIII aren't MORE damaging! What a doofus. But he was only about 19 years old, so... there you go.

Christine said...

Maybe Fast and the Furious damaged him?

Expat mum said...

Knowing Chicago, he's probably on the payroll of some American film maker who's jealous and trying to slur the movie's reputation!! Either that or Mayor Daly said he didn't like it.